Week 193: Marriages and the Death of a Newborn
The
circumstances of this particular tragedy can be quite varied. In some
cases the death has been long expected and to some degree prepared for because
of prenatal testing. In other cases the death is totally unexpected but
comes quickly after birth. And yet, in still other situations, the
newborn’s death, though almost a medical certainty, is delayed for days or even
months.
One
of the hardest things about infant death is the sudden and absolute reversal of
emotions. Joyful expectation is usurped by gut-wrenching sadness.
The hopeful anticipation of investing one’s life in the nurture of a child is
crushed by the heavy darkness of sudden and seemingly senseless loss.
It
is the rare couple that can face such a reversal and not experience relational
problems within their marriage. Rarely do spouses experience and handle
grief in the same way. These differences can lead to misunderstandings
and conflicts. Many times spouses suffering their own grief are not
capable of meeting the needs of their marriage partner. This situation
can lead to emotional isolation and helplessness, particularly since others who
could step in and be supportive are often at a loss of what to do or say.
Please
pray that these hurting couples will
- Be protected by the sustaining power of God’s intimate presence
- Resist the urge to push their spouse away but rather cling to and comfort one another
- Allow time and space for profound grief
- Understand grieving is a process full of fits and starts, hills and valleys
- Know that, though much has been lost, all is not lost
- Experience joy again and soon
- Have wise and compassionate friends who know the healing power of the quiet presence of loving friend
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