Week 229: Marriages and the Death of a Newborn

Please join us this week in praying for marriages that have suffered the excruciating pain of the death of a newborn baby. In past weeks we have called on you to pray for those who have had a child to die as well as for those who have suffered the painful disappointment of a miscarriage. Many of the issues experienced by couples that have faced those tragedies are also common to those who have lost a newborn.

The circumstances of this particular tragedy can be quite varied. In some cases the death has been long expected and to some degree prepared for because of prenatal testing. In other cases the death is totally unexpected and comes quickly after birth. And yet, in still other situations, the newborn’s death, though almost a medical certainty, is delayed for days or even months.

One of the hardest things about infant death is the sudden and absolute reversal of emotions. Joyful expectation is usurped by gut-wrenching sadness. The hopeful anticipation of investing one’s life in the nurture of a child is crushed by the heavy darkness of sudden and seemingly senseless loss.

It is the rare couple that can face such a reversal and not experience relational problems within their marriage. Rarely do spouses experience and handle grief in the same way. These differences can lead to misunderstandings and conflicts.  Many times spouses suffering their own grief are not capable of meeting the needs of their marriage partner. This situation can lead to emotional isolation and helplessness, particularly since others who could step in and be supportive are often at a loss of what to do or say.

Please pray that these hurting couples will

• Be protected by the sustaining power of God’s intimate presence
• Resist the urge to push their spouse away but rather cling to and comfort one another
• Allow time and space for profound grief
• Understand grieving is a process full of fits and starts, hills and valleys
• Know that, though much has been lost, all is not lost
• Experience joy again and soon
• Have wise and compassionate friends who know the healing power of the quiet presence of loving friend